Weekly Blog Post

Posted in Dys-Adventure

Planner Conundrum

Hello humans of the internet! Before we go any further let’s all take a moment to be proud that I spelled conundrum correctly I did spend way too much time on that but I figured it out!

I’m pretty sure I’ve talked about my need for planners. It helps me figure out what I’m doing every day and I use stickers and all that. I’m still jealous of people who can have super fancy planners, but I have trouble reading those all that would defeat the purpose of a planner. But that is not the conundrum of the day. The conundrum of today that my old planner stopped in May and my new planner doesn’t start until July. So I’m trying to squeeze everything into my tiny calendar boxes. Which would be fine, but I put stuff for my day job, stuff for the blog, personal life stuff, period tracking, the box fills up quickly. I also like putting my grocery lists, monthly highlights lists, my reward stickers (yes I give myself reward stickers) and meal plans in my planner. It’s been a long month feeling mildly stressed because I don’t have a planner.

Much love

AK

Advertisements
Posted in Dys-Adventure

The zoo!

I’ve been a little busy helping get everything ready for a wedding at my sister’s house. It look beautiful until we had to take everything down due to a massive thunderstorm. It was really nice though. That aside, I did go to the zoo.

Riverbanks zoo is always fun, but right now they have a dinosaur exhibit. I don’t know if y’all have ever seen it, but there’s a traveling exhibit of animatronic dinosaurs. I’ve seen it before at the state museum, but let me tell you, it was so much cooler at the zoo because they were set up outside which was awesome. And here’s some pictures…I took more pictures on the polaroid (off brand cheap polaroid like camera) so I can’t post them right this second, but here’s some other pictures.

We had a great time. I was a little sad because I love going to the zoo with Schulz but it was still fun.

Much love

AK

Posted in Dys-Adventure

How to know its summer

If you’re stepping outside to the warm humid air to take your dog for her evening walkand the sun is still shining at 8:45pm, you know it’s summer.

If there’s been a thunderstorm every day for at least a week, you know it’s summer.

If it’s been 100 degrees for at least a few minutes at the heat of the day for a month, you know it’s summer.

If everyone you went to high school with is posting beach pictures on social media while you’re stuck at work, you know it’s summer.

If you’re going to at least 3 weddings sometime in the next 3 months, you know it’s summer.

If you’ve seen at least 1 person on social media being proposed to on the beach, you know it’s summer.

If it’s so humid your hair is defying gravity, you know it’s summer.

Posted in Dys-Adventure

And then I wait

Hello humans of the internet! Today one again I’m talking about the emotions involved with dating someone in the military. It’s a lot of emotions constantly. I promise to talk about something less heavy next time.

I feel blessed that in the way the world is I get to hear from my boyfriend way more often than basically every military significant other before me. Today we have emails and the occasional text sent hurriedly across the world. Which is amazing and today I wanted to talk about all the emotions around that.

When I get that text or email all I feel is pure joy and relief. He’s alright, he’s got access to a computer. I can almost hear his voice in the typed words. And then I get the inevitable message. “I love you. I email as soon as I can.”

Sometimes it’s minutes after the first message. Sometimes it’s a day or two even. And then it’s see you soon all over again. And the not knowing exactly when soon will be. You can’t do a count down to an approximate date. And then I wait again to hear. I wait for him to come back. This is a life of waiting and more waiting. I’m waiting to find out which day I’m waiting for. Atend that’s where I’m at. Waiting some more. I did plan to write something a little more peppy today but this is all that’s on my mind so I guess I’ll turn on Mumford and sons “I Will Wait” and tough it out.

Much love

AK

Posted in Dys-Adventure

Am I Disabled Revisited: Is Disability a bad word

Hello Humans of the internet! So, about a week ago I made a post which you can see here and as much as I don’t like doing anything that feels like self-promo, this post really won’t make sense if you haven’t read that post. This post is inspired by the conversation I had with Elizabeth and you can see her here. You really should go read her blog, she’s a really interesting person. Now that you’ve had a chance to either catch up, decide you don’t care enough to catch up and want to read this anyway, or have decided that you are not interested in reading this and moved on, let’s get on with the post.

So, as you might know: I’m a person with dyslexia. Dyslexia is considered a learning disability. So, am I disabled? Yes. Obviously there are many different kinds of disabilities and a dyslexic person isn’t going to take the parking right next to the door; that’s for a person who has walking difficulties. And that is as good a spring board as any to lead us into the discussion of is disability a bad word?

Personally, I think that sometimes you have to use the word disabled in order to get the assistance that you need to go about life. For example, my grandmother has walking difficulties and needs to park in the parking spots closest to the door. A way to do this is by having disabled parking and those blue mirror hanging things. (this might not be how it is where you are, but here that’s what works) It makes sure that the space stays open for the people who need it, like my grandmother.

In high school and college being labeled as disabled and having a 504 plan gave me access to notes in such a way that I was able to learn.

So, I didn’t plan on writing too much on this post. I just wanted to start a conversation really. If you are a person who fall into a category of any kind of disability (a physically disability, a learning disability, an invisible disability, any kind of disability that I’m forgetting right now) tell me your opinions on the word disability. If you are close to someone with a disability of any kind ask them and let me know how they feel. This is something I really want to know other people’s opinions on because I’m by no means an authority, the only thing I know about is my own life.

Please tell me what you think about the word disability (mostly if you are disabled.)

much love to everyone

AK

Posted in Dys-Adventure

Reusable Shopping Bags in a Small Southern Town

Hello humans of the internet. As some of you may be aware, I live in a small southern town. Living in a small southern town is great most of the time but it also means you run into a lot of less fun things like sexism, racism, and people who believe that climate change is a myth started to hide the existence of godzilla. Okay, I’ve only encountered one person who think climate change is a godzilla cover up, but I have met a lot of people who think environmentally friendly ideas and products are somehow bad for you and occasionally people who think it’s unChristian to recycle. So being a person who does her best to make environmental choices and is *gasp* vegetarian, I get a lot of reactions and I thought i should share those with you starting with: reusable shopping bags.

I’ve collected a fair number of reusable shopping bags and I’ve always tried to use them, sometimes I do sometimes I don’t. About a month ago I decided to commit to the reusable shopping bag life. I picked 3 and started keeping them in my purse and I’ve been using them everytime I’ve gone to the store for almost a month. And I’ve gotten reactions. I walked to the grocery store that’s down the street from where I work and picked up a quick lunch. Before the cashier started bagging my groceries I pulled out my bags and asked if I could use them for my bags instead of the plastic bags. The cashier gave me the meanest stink eye I’ve seen since high school then said, we have bags.

I asked again and she ended up just handing me my groceries with a look of disgust.

Other places aren’t as much of a problem. The Walmart which is the closest big grocery store has a self check out now so I don’t have to deal with cashiers being mean there. I do have to deal with other shoppers because the second I pull out my reusable shopping bags the people behind me in line start doing that angry sign and huffing impatiently. So that’s really polite of them.

Do you use reusable shopping bags or plastic disposable bags? How do people react to reusable shopping bags where you’re from?

Much love

AK

Posted in Dys-Adventure

Make Art

Hello humans of the internet! As you might know, from this post, my job is to make art. And yes, it is pretty cool to do what I love for a living. I mean most days it’s kind of boring and all I make is just monogram after monogram. But some days I get to be creative and make my own designs to sell. This was one of those days. I’m particularly proud of my art today and thought I’d share it. It’s right here. And here’s a picture of you don’t feel like going there. Or would be nice if you did, but you don’t have to.

Much love

AK

Posted in Dys-Adventure

House Plants again

Hello humans of the internet. What do y’all think about this becoming a house plant blog? Asking because I bought plants again. Also, lets be real talking about things like cute little plants and puppies is way easier than talking about real things like dyslexia and deployment. I need to do better at coming up with names for posts about plants if I’m going to talk about them this much.

I considered not putting pictures in this post because I didn’t want to get up and take pictures. But I realize that a post about plants and that needs pictures.

This is my beautiful jade plant. She is currently very small, but she will get to up 36 inches which is just so big and lovely. Her name is Jochebed. She’s with my other jade plants. Behind her is my gollum jade or trumpet jade. He’s thriving. His name is Jethro and he’s about 2 inches taller than he was when I bought him this winter. And of to the side you can see just a little bit of the trailing jade named Ramses the second. He is my second trailing jade, the first trailing jade was eaten by Simon, my late cat when he was a kitten. If you can’t tell jade plants are one of my favorites.

This beautiful new plant is called a golden gate peperomia. This is a really cool tropical plant. It’s got really sturdy, succulent-like leaves. It is one of the more finicky plants that I’ve ever owned. This one does not have a name yet. If you have any ideas for a name please let me know. You can see the corner of a fish tank in this picture this is the betta tank that I talked about a while ago here. I did get a fish tank for this tank. He was in really bad shape when I found him at a Wal-Mart (not the same Wal-Mart that I found Sushi at, but in similar or worse condition.) I will be introducing y’all to this fish, who’s name is Kai soon, I wanted to wait until he was no longer suffering from fin rot so that y’all could see the sad pictures and the healthy pictures. He is looking particularly healthy.

So, I hope y’all like hearing about plants and betta fish. That’s what I want to talk about right now. The world isn’t great, but we can keep rescuing little fishies and surrounding ourselves with beautiful plants in a little indoor jungle.

If you like plants, let me know an idea for the golden gate peperomia.

much love

AK

Posted in Dys-Adventure

Am I Disabled?

Hello humans of the internet! Let’s all just take a moment to laugh at several months ago me who thought that she didn’t have to be defined by dyslexia. Today I am asking a question that I have been asked and that I have asked myself. Rather, it is a question that I have been forced to ask myself after rather uncomfortable encounters. As you see from the title the questions is: Am I disabled?

So, am I disabled?

Well that’s a complicated question, isn’t it?

What brought this question into my mind?

That’s a lot easier. Several years ago now, I was in an airport. I don’t think I’ve told this story before but it was quite a while ago, so maybe. I don’t think I’ll include which airport because outside of this one man, it was a fairly comfortable airport experience. But, this one man was very stressful. As you might have noticed, I’m dyslexic. I’m about to go on a brief tangent about what my personal dyslexia is. If you don’t care about that, skip the next paragraph.

My technical diagnosis is an orthographic processing problem/dyslexic. I had to sit through more than 6 hours of testing. Yes you read that correctly, 6 hours. I was diagnosed at 15. The doctor told me that she had consulted with 9 of her peers while reviewing my tests in order to come up with my diagnosis. It was explained to me as dyslexia, but I had developed a lot of coping skills so, I didn’t show up as quite dyslexic on the test. So, potentially, if I’d been diagnosed younger, it would have been a lot easier to diagnose. Basically what it means is that I have all the symptom of dyslexia, but somehow I managed to learn some kind of weird way to read. Now, this is important I feel for the first question: am I disabled and the story about the airport.

So back to the airport, when I got the ticket we called the airport and they gave me number that I was supposed to present at the special assistance desk and then they would take me to my gate. This was something that I really needed because having reading difficulties makes it really hard to find large colored signs with numbers on them. When I’d gotten through security, I started looking for the special assistance desk. I couldn’t find it. I eventually went to a security gaurd and asked them where to find the special assistance desk. He pointed and told me to look for a sign. I ended up asking another security guard and he looked a little confused and pointed at a giant sign with an arrow that was about 4 feet away from me. I followed the arrow. And here’s the thing: it was nearly impossible to find the special assistance desk and it was quite a long walk from the front. Finally, I found the desk, I wasn’t sure that this was the desk because it was so isolated and hard to find. I reached in my purse and pulled out the number I was meant to present to the special assistance desk. I held out the paper with the number and said, I was told to find the special assistance desk and give you this because I need help getting to my gate. The man sneered “you don’t look disabled.”

I froze. The man just went back to what he was doing and completely ignored me. I didn’t know what to do. Honestly, I just sat there for a second. Then I turned around and walked away. I didn’t know what to do. The signs were all yellow with blue and blue with yellow and that’s one of the hardest color combinations for me to read. I ended up following my own advice and finding someone who looked grandmotherly and asked them. I walked up to someone and said, I have dyslexia and I can’t read. Then showed them my ticket and they pointed me in the right direction.

Which brings me back to the one statement that has been bugging me for years. “You don’t look disabled.” This statement has slowly evolved into “Am I disabled?”

For a long time I didn’t know the answer. According to the Learning Disabilities Association of America, dyslexia is a learning disability. And unless I severally misunderstood, which is possible because *dyslexia*, under the Americans with Disabilities Act dyslexia is typically considered a disability. So, I guess I could be considered disabled by the U.S. government, but I would have to go through a bit of a process. I don’t know that dyslexia is considered a disability in every country, honestly deciphering the “easy to read” version of one set of rules was hard enough for me.

Am I disabled?

The short answer is yes.

The long answer is I am affected pretty much every day by being dyslexic. Dyslexia is a relatively noninvasive disability. I am able to just sort of pretend that I’m not dyslexic when I first meet people and am still getting a feel for how they would react. I don’t do that anymore, I am way more straight up because honestly if you’re going to act like I’m suddenly stupid the moment you find out I’m dyslexic, I don’t want to waste time being friends because that’s not a friend. So, I’m disabled, but I don’t care? Potentially because I’ve always been dyslexic, it doesn’t actually bother me if I’m disabled or not.

Obviously, people’s reactions to dyslexia bothers me. And the things that I can’t do that a “normal” person would be able to easily do still stress me out.

If I could be dyslexic and only encounter people who weren’t bothered if I asked for reading help and not being asked to do any of the things that I just can’t do, then I would be 100% fine with it. It’s hard to explain. Dyslexia is part of the person God made me. This might be a little rambly. To sum up, I’m dyslexic, that means I’m disabled, that’s not a bad thing.

Are you disabled? If you are and feel comfortable sharing, what is your disability and what is the rudest thing a stranger has said to you?

much love

especially much love to anyone who isn’t feeling particularly loved right now.

AK

Posted in Dys-Adventure

May 2019 Highlights

Hello humans of the internet! Another month has gone and with it another school year. Am I in school? not even a little bit. It has been years (years plural) since I’ve been in school. I barely know the school schedule anymore. But this year is the first year that I’ve known this many graduates, honestly I think I know more graduates this year than I did in 2013. So, instead of talking about my month, I’d like to address the 2019 graduating class.

So, in no particular order, high school and college graduates: Angel, Kayla, Brenna, Caleb, Jacob, Jeremy, Perla, Katherine, anyone that I might be forgetting or leaving out because I refuse to accept that you are 18 and graduating from high school now (Chloe). One of you was my room mate, some of you I know from work, some of you I know from theater, and that’s literally all I do. I work and I do theater. So, this is for you and all of your graduating class.

You are wonderfully resilient human beings, every single one of you. People will tell you otherwise. Those people will be wrong. You are amazing. When people tell you that your world view is wrong, remember that they are viewing a different world. Every generation has viewed a different world. You should talk to them about it and talk to them about your world. Communication between generations is important for understanding each other. And understanding each other is important for the world. And the whole not causing some kind of dystopian horrorscape.

But what do I know? I’m only 24. I’ve made a million mistakes. I’ve made mistakes that turned out okay and mistakes that did not at all. I’m not a person who can give anyone advice.

I wish that I could give you, especially the high school ones of you, a list of rules of ways to avoid all difficulties and traumas. I know that the world is a dark place. I know that there are a lot of not kind people. You’ll meet them. You’ll also meet a lot of wonderful people. You’ll meet fantastic people that have beautiful voices, wonderful stories, fascinating interests, talk to all of them. They have better advice than I could give and better stories than I could tell.

It will be hard. It will be fantastic. It will seem impossible. It will seem easy. It will go great. It will go terrible. The only thing that I can assure you of is that life will go. On the worst nights, the sun still rises. The worse storms still die down. And as Mrs. Gayle Cooper told me when I graduated, “I hope you dance”

I really do hope you dance. I hope that no matter what happens in your life and in the world, you have joy. I know in the really dark moments when your standing in the shower crying for 3 hours while you try to figure out what your life means, someone saying “I hope you dance” won’t be very helpful. But I hope that if you ever find yourself crying in the shower for 3 hours, you will one day dance again. I hope that you will heal enough, even if there are little scars in your heart, that they will be little thin lines and you will have joy.

Honestly, I hope you never stand in the shower crying for 3 hours or anything similar. Realistically, you’ll have bad days. You’ll have really really bad days. But don’t let them steal the joy of the really good days.

If you have any actual advice for the 2019 graduates, leave it in a comment. If you are a 2019 graduate, please read the comments. I’m 100% sure that those are better advice and I don’t even know if there are any comments.

much love to all the graduates

AK