Hello humans of the internet! As you might have noticed, I’ve been dating my marine for a little while now. And let me tell you the people of this small southern town, have a thing or two to say about it. The following are real conversations I’ve had with real people.
- The most common among adults who know both of us. Not that we aren’t adults but people who were adults when we met.
When people find out I’m dating someone they are first, relieved because I’m 24 and they thought I’d die alone, then they ate very, very curious.
“Anyone we know?”
Yes it’s Schulz. We were friends growing up his parents live just over there.
“Oh, I thought you went to public school.”
“Yes, I did. We met at the theater.”
“What’s he doing, did he ever go to school? I haven’t seen him in years.”
“Well he’s a Marine.”
“Really?” They are always incredulous, “they skinny boy? He’s so little.” Or “I must be thinking of someone else.” Or some other variation of surprise. This is about the time I feel like I’m dating Hiccup from How to Train Your Dragon.
2. The most common among peers who know both of us after seeing our relationship status on facebook
“Wow, did not see that coming”
“No like really. I had know idea you liked each other. That’s crazy.”
We do, I say while thinking, I mean, we’ve liked each other since high school, it’s not like we were flirting subtly back then, we were 17.
“Seriously, though, you like him? He’s kinda you know….”
Yep, I like him, that’s why we’re dating.
“I was shocked when I saw that on facebook. I just don’t understand it.”
This is the point where I feel even more like I’m dating Hiccup from How to Train Your Dragon.
These interactions make me want to scream because they are clearly still picturing the awkward 18 year old he was the last time they saw him. The thing is, that wasn’t yesterday, that was 5 or 6 years ago. Also, I thought he was cute when I we were 17, please stop insulting my man.
3. This one is usually well meaning people who only know me.
“If your boyfriend is a marine, why aren’t you married?”
That’s kind of a personal decision.
“I’m not being ugly, I’m just asking. I mean wouldn’t it be better for you to just go get married.”
We don’t think that’s the best decision right now.
“I just don’t get it. Why aren’t you married?”
Unfortunately, it would be rude to scream, why do you care so much?
4. This one has only happened once. I was wearing Schulz’s shirt because he’s deployed and I like wearing it.
“I love that shirt.”
Thanks, it’s Schulz’s.
I am still confused by that interaction.
5. This one has also only happened once. I made a shirt that’s red with a gold glitter Marine symbol and the words “I will wait.” I wear it every Friday while he’s deployed.
“That’s kind of an ugly shirt.”
Thanks, I’m wearing for my boyfriend because he’s a marine.
“It’s still ugly”
Well, I’m wearing it while my boyfriend is deployed.
“That’s a dumb reason to wear a shirt.”
Unfortunately, this interaction happened at work so I just smiled and continued asking about their order.
6. The ever popular
“Why is he away?”
Because he’s a marine
“Why is he a marine?”
That is his job.
“I could do that”
Be a marine?
“I mean that either, but I can’t imagine dating one. Why would you want to do that?”
I love him and that’s just what his job is.
“I would never let (husband/ fiance/ boyfriend) do that.”
Honestly, I have no idea how to respond to that. And frankly, that’s rude. Why would you say that?
This has been my experience dating a marine in a small southern town. I know some of these are true of any relationship. But all of them feel a little invasive.