Hello Humans of the internet! Today we are talking about dating Schulz. He’s a marine and I wanted to talk about what that’s like for me at home waiting for him to get back. Just a heads up for everyone this is going to get a little dark, because sometimes it’s really hard. Basically, this is a list of reasons why you should never date a member of the military.
Basically, my mind is constantly playing the Mumford & Sons song, “I Will Wait.” Constantly. All the time. Just the chorus because I don’t actually know all the words.
The constant fear that maybe whatever the last thing I said to him was the last thing I’d ever get to say to him
The fear that I am not strong enough to provide emotional support for all that he has to deal with.
What if he gets hurt and no one tells me because I’m just his girlfriend. I’m not a wife so no one would call me. What if he’s in the hospital and I can’t see him in the hospital.
This is the love of my life. I spend 50% of the day knowing that waiting is worth it and 50% of the day hating every moment that I can’t spend with him.
So basically instead of letting myself get to lost in my panic-stress self thinking about every worst scenario, I have been trying to focus on positives, like fish keeping and house plants. Of course Peggy takes up a lot of time and mental energy.
Sorry if this is a little sad. I try to have a positive swing on everything. But today the only real positive is that I love him.
I hope that everyone is having a great time and is feeling better than I am right now.